Our emotional feelings of stress and anxiety are normally triggered by some kind of primal survival fear associated with one of the following three issues    SEPARATION and associated feelings of aloneness;      EXCLUSION and associated feelings of disempowerment;     and      ISOLATION and associated feelings of fear. The following short stories also illustrate one of the these three headings:-

And So…..

And so with peaceful steps and a joyful heart I took his hand and smiled with contentment as we walked up the path on the mountain of love.  He was so keen that it felt as if he chose the path and the pace at which we climbed.  Yet then, without warning, he walked no more, as if the heights were too scary in their isolation and the terrain above too unfamiliar or dangerous to be considered inviting.  Indeed even where we stood now appeared to be experienced by him as an undesirable place.  Thus, he turned and letting go of my hand –  ran, stumbling and tumbling in his efforts to get back to the safety of the busy lowland slopes, where others gathered together sharing and working for their daily needs; occasionally observing the mountain slopes so high in the sky and on into the heavens.  And so it is that here I stand abandoned, watching in amazement as he punishes himself on a pathless, reckless descent – returning in such haste into the company of the lowlands, but now with a wild aloneness and confusion that he seems unable to completely appease. What have I done, has my gift of love turned to a burden of stone.  Why and how did our journey so sweet turn into this downhill run. If my best is this disastrous what should I do? Why must I be alone so high on the mountain, so far away from home.  What I pray is the lesson to be learned.  ‘Please, please may he find contentment and another joyous path to follow.’  His guilt is my loneliness, his confusion my despair, please God hear our prayers, guide us gently forward in our learning to trust life’s kaleidoscope of unexpected patterns.

[This story speaks for itself as a creative process that helped the author to process her lost dream of companionship and a compassionate perspective.]

Expressing Our Emotions
The strongest motivation for creative expression is probably that of our emotional expression of feelings. The range of different feelings identified within vocabulary is very extensive and often relates to uncomfortable feelings related to emotionally challenging circumstances as listed below. Transcribing this list into the positive creates an extensive challenge with regards to vocabulary as well as a pleasing focus on positive feelings.  :-

Abandoned Anger Aggressive Arrogant Apprehensive Awful Argumentative Ashamed Anxious Aggravated Boredom Bitter Blind Broken-hearted Burdened Betrayed Concerned Confused Criticized Claustrophobic Difficult Disorganized Defensive Distressed Depressed Doubt Dirty Deceived Disappointment Disloyal Discontent Drained Discouraged Disgusted Egotistical Embarrassed Exasperated

Envy Empty Failure Fear Forced Forlorn Forsaken Futile Frigid Frustration Grief Guilt Hate Haughty Helpless Hopeless Humiliation Hurt Hurried Impatient Insecure Incapable Impossible Injustice Irritated Intolerant Inadequate Irresponsible Imposed upon Indecisive Jealous Longing Lonely Left-out Lies Lost Let-down

Misunderstood Mean Miserable Nauseated Neglected Nervous Obligated Oppressed Overwhelmed Paranoid Punished Powerless Pain Pity Pressured Provoked Panic Rejection Repulsive Resentful Restless Restriction Selfish Shameful Shattered Sour Sorrow Stubborn Stuck-up Suppressed Shock Smug Stifled Spiteful Sad Shy Stupid

Scared Sceptical Terror Torment Teased Troubled Too much responsibility Thoughtless Trauma Unaccepted Undesirable Unneeded Unfriendly Uneasy Unfulfilled Unpleasant Unhappy Unhelpful Unsuccessful Unwanted Used Unworthy Unloved Unreliable Useless Unsociable Unconcerned Upset Unwanted Vindictive Vulnerable Wasted Worthless Weary Wounded Wrong Wretched

This short story ‘THE TALL WALL’ is not based on any outward experience it is an imaginary scenario that illustrates how our feelings of confinement and despair colour the perception of our reality with emotional anxiety and practical limitatiions.

THE TALL WALL

Here am I, who am I? Whoever I is, is stuck between a wall and a bush. The wall is tall and too difficult to climb, I can’t see how high it is. I can’t see what is on the other side.  The bush is dense with thorns that puncture me with pains and I can’t see how thick it is, I can’t see what is beyond it.  I feel I have neither the skills nor the knowledge to make a decision of what or how to tackle the solid tall wall or the thick thorny bush.

So I sit and moan. I sit and wait for help. I sit and complain – to myself about myself – about whoever built the solid wall, and the seed that grow into the thorny bush.  I challenge the universe with whY questions.  When the sun shines bright I shelter against the tall wall for shade. When the night is cold I curled up under the thick thorny bush for warmth.  When the bright dawn rises I bemoan my day of futile occupation in the space between the tall wall and the thorny bush.  I envy the birds that sing so sweetly, they can fly in and out of my difficult place and perch safely on the top of the wall and sit comfortably in the thorny bush.  I curse the confinement of my heavy body and bewildered mind. Why doesn’t God help me? Why am I here? God please send someone to find me, my existence on rain water and berries is a form of survival that I find dull and meaningless. What is the point? I’m not important? Life’s not important? What is important? I don’t know! As my insides crumble and my mind gives up the struggling, I feel my heart beat, its soothing persistence negotiates through the inner rubble with flowing comforts of humility and I remember sweetness, and I pray to God the song of gratitude for even now I can feel His divine love for me. As I look up with new eyes into my thick thorny bush and my solid tall wall, I accept their comforting shade and warm – a small songbird flies down beside me. I watch sadly as it flies away into the warm morning sunlight and within my stillness I move to follow its path, I discover spaces between the tall wall and the thorny bush, I follow weaving my unchallenged body comfortably, following a clear and obvious path that I had not discovered before.

How had I not seen such a simple solution to my story of life between a solid tall wall and a thick thorny bush.

For me this story metaphorically represents how resistance and pain meet light and space and live happily ever after in the land of unconditional love.

Sleeping at the Beach by Charlotte Duffy

I lay on my back in the long prickly grass of the sand dunes, gazing at the stars. The crackle of the camp fire echoed on the cool night and I listened to the sounds of my friend’s breathing as they slept. It was late summer and the first gusts of autumn wind whistled through the wiry grass. There was a bright half-moon that gave a ghostly reflection o the calm rippling waves, and the dark sand seemed an endless stretch of flat eeriness gradually being swallowed up by the incoming tide.

As I lay there, I heard faint footsteps crunching over the thin twigs that lay scattered on the dry sand. I sat up and looked over at my friends, wondering who was up and walking about. But the four dark sleeping figures hadn’t moved. I lay back down, and as I dozed off the footsteps came back, closer this time. A cold shiver ran the length of my body. I could hear a steady breathing that definitely wasn’t coming from my friends. I got up quickly and reached for a heavy branch from the pile we had gathered for the fire. The moon suddenly hid behind a cloud, now the only light came from the small glow of the dying fire. I crept forward, held the branch up high. Two eyes flashed at me, I turned to run but something held me back, before I could do anything something came bounding out of the grass straight towards me. I froze; Just then the moon appeared from behind the clouds. I saw it was a dog – I almost fainted with relief. It was a rough collie, thin and dirty, and limping on one paw. I lowered the branch and crouched down, holding out my hand to the dog. It crept towards me, breathing in steady breaths and paws crunching softly on the twigs below, exactly the sounds I’d heard a few minutes before. The dog stepped cautiously towards my outstretched hand then stopped. I whispered to it to come closer, but it was no use. The dog turned and was off, running like the wind. It suddenly stopped on a high dune and looked out to sea, before it disappeared into the darkness. I got up to follow but though better of it, and walked slowly back to the fire. I shivered as the wind got stronger, then it changed direction and the smoke from the fire encircled me, making my eyes water. I pulled my jacket closer around myself to keep warm and climbed into my sleeping bag, yawning.

I lay there, staring at the spot where the dog had disappeared. As I lay there listening to the crashing tide, I wondered if it would be alright out there alone. I drifted into an uneasy sleep, my dreams haunted by flashing eyes, long moaning howls and the crunch of footsteps.

• Creative expression of feelings can be explored with activities that list opposite feelings. For example a list of undesirable feelings can be paired with positive feelings and then used for the memory game of pairs. The players not only get the opportunity to identify with different feelings, they can also witness how these feelings may influence their memory.

Abandoned Anger Aggressive Claustrophobic Difficult Disorganized Failure Fear Forced

United Joy Passive Expansive Easy Organised Success Trust Encouraged

Impossible Injustice Irritated Criticized Obligated Oppressed Sad Selfish Shame Traumatic

Possible Justice Appeased Praised Willing Outgoing Happy Unselfish Confidence Pleasant

• Look up the descriptions of symptoms and healing associated with the Dr. Bach Flower remedies. Consider which ones you feel are most applicable to yourself and describe two opposite incidents that illustrate how you have or might behave differently from the positive and negative disposition described in relation to your chosen remedy.

Ainsworth 38 original Dr. Bach Flower Remedies are prepared from the flowers of wild plants, bushes and trees and closely reproduce the original remedies made by Dr, Bach in the 1930’s. “The effect of the remedies is not to suppress negative attitudes but to transform them into positive ones,’[The 38 Flower Remedies formally the work of Dr. Edward Bach’; Wigmore Pub, 1995: 5-6] Each remedy is noted for the negative aspects that it can transform into positive dispositions: Chestnut is noted as a remedy for failure to learn from past mistakes and when taken it is noted for bringing about a positive ability to gain knowledge from experience. [Dictionary of the Bach Flower Remedies –Positive and negative aspects by T.W.Hyne Jones]

An interesting and potentially therapeutic activity can be sorting both positive or negative words associated with emotional feelings under the three headings: separation, isolation and exclusion. Each list can then be used to inspire art work and creative writing to illustrate each of the three heading.

At the Station by Charlotte Duffy

I sat at on a red plastic bench on the busy platform of the station watching the crowds of people push past each other, rushing off to their different destinations. I sighed and closed the magazine I had bought and looked at my watch; my train was late. A girl stood talking near my bench, talking on her phone. She threw her cigarette to the floor and walked off, her heals clicking loudly on the concrete.

I realised someone was sitting on the bench who I hadn’t even noticed. It was a man of about sixty, dirty and wearing tattered and torn clothes. By his feet was one battered plastic bag and a small thin dog, fast asleep. People pushed past him as if he didn’t exist. He hummed softly to himself and his gaze never moved. I stood up a joined the queue up to the snack bar counter. Five minutes later I was carrying two cups of tea carefully back to the bench. The man was still sitting there, as motionless as a stone statue. I held out a cup of tea to him, and he turned and gazed blankly at me. Without a word he took the cup and nodded slightly. The air was suddenly filled with a roar as my train pulled into the station. I reached for my bag and hurried through a door. I strode down the packed carriage, searching for a spare seat. I found one beside the window and settled into it. The whistle blew and the doors closed. As the train began to move slowly, I looked out at the bench I had spent one hour of my life sitting on. The man was still there, clutching the cup of tea in his dirty, gloved hands. The train began to pick up speed, he looked up, stared directly at me , and winked.

Activities:-

Write or tell a short story, poem or piece of prose to illustrate one or more of the issues SEPARATION      EXCLUSION      and      ALONENESS. Then Listen to or read aloud one of the example stories presented above and finally return to your own story and explore the emotional issues and feelings presented and explore any possible  enrichment and/or expansion.

Using the Angel Cards

The Angel Cards provide an excellent source of spontaneous guidance that can encourage positive thoughts. An activity the author has devised using the Angle cards is as follows.

• Spread the angel cards face down in an arch on a suitable flat surface.
• Collect three cards and place them in the as shown below:

Turn over the cards in their respective order – taking plenty of time to consider each card separately before going on to the next card.

• Using the three words on the create a positive affirmation that brings the three words into a meaningful phrase or sentence that feels helpful.

For Example if the first word was TRUST and the second was PEACE and the third word was LOVE. I might create the affirmation :-

Individuals or a small group of people can make up their own set of angel cards to be used in the above activity.

• Using a set of word cards that describe negative /challenging emotions each person could choose a word to represent a neutral disposition and then another word card for the opposite positive emotion. Then these three word cards are used to create a phrase sentence/s that describe a person’s journey from the original negative emotion through to a neutral calmer disposition and on into positive feelings. The POSITIVENeutralNEGATIVE word list above can also be used to provide the three key words for this type of sentence making activity. For example:  Understanding Pause Shallow Breathing  could be used as in the following –   When I PAUSE to observe my SHALLOW state of BREATHING I can gain an UNDERSTANDING of how I am feeling. Or  My shallow breathing caused me to pause for a rest and it was then that I remembered the last time this happened to me; I could see that I needed to attain a level of healing that would help me react in a different way in the future.

• Writing about feelings may be short and simple, and wonderfully wise

The only limitation on time is adversity.
The only limitation on words is understanding.
The only limitation on thought is lack of wisdom.
Yet, what power is there in any number of wise words without a moment of love?